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YaYaYaYaYa
Dear Thyroid,
Tomorrow we have yet another blood test and a little added treat: an HPV shot! Joy. But that’s unimportant. You don’t feel joy.
I can tell. I can tell that emotions aren’t really your zone. You just like pretending that you have emotions, dipping your fingers into my emotions so you can see me squirm with discomfort, cry over the stupidest things, or laugh at all the jokes that aren’t even funny.
I just wanted to let you know that yesterday I was looking at pictures. They were of the family trips that we took earlier, back at the beginning of high school. There are pictures of me from all over Lithuania. I looked so happy, and, as I recall, that was an amazing trip. I just saw several pictures of me, wearing sweatshirts and looking completely comfortable. You might be thinking, “Sweatshirts are supposed to be comfortable, why would it be any different?” I’ll tell you why.
Because since you’ve grown up, and out, expanding the circumference of my neck, sweatshirts have strangled me. I cut a slit down the front of the thing, so you’ll have more room to breathe. I looked so happy in these pictures, with sweatshirts uncut, and space to spare.
That doesn’t mean I hate you. I still have to live with you. But would you mind loosening your grip on my life?
Yours,
Monika
Tags: Dear Thyroid Letters, Thyroid patient letters
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3 Responses to “YaYaYaYaYa”
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Dear Thyroid,Today is Thursday July 23,2009.
I just called the Dr.’s office and ranted to whom ever just answered the phone.I can feel myself going down.Its hard to
believe something so small as a YOU!(Thyroid) could make me feel so crazy.2 weeks ago when I went to the Dr.’s office I was
feeling very tired and some what depressed,(of course I had just come off a crying spell and had felt like hell)He took
more blood work and I had a urine test cause my left side was hurting like a bad bruise.and the finding was a slight
infection,so on meds again.Hopeing for no kidney stones! any way I go back to see him a week later to check on blood test
results and my infection.Which the infection is gone now.Well same ole same ole..in the normal range.But this dr. visit I
felt really Good and for the next whole week I’m great, breaking out like a teenager but acting like a horn dog to my
husband( which he truly enjoys at this point)Kinda on the hyper side but can actually sleep because by the end of the day
I’m exchausted.Wake up bright and early 5:30 or 6:00 am and ready for the day,Making everyone breakfast,
cleaning,shopping,cooking…Myself… that I haven’t seen in years!But this week all is not well…I hurt all over like I’m
90 years old…I think My 85 year old Granmother feels better,she looks better!My skin is going from oily now to very
dry…No in between,My hair is falling out in wads and I’m now pissed at feeling bad,so I let the nurse know that I was not
happy,If I am going down the nut case slide I’m taking them(Dr.’s) with me…
No work yet ….waiting for the Dr. to call me back or call something in.I’ll have to keep an eye out,they may be sending
the people with the white coats..!!I will be the one yelling …Its not me its the Thyroid!
Crazied Lady,
Angel
Angel,
I hope it helps to you to know you are not alone. I have been in the same situation as you and I know it is a crazy ride, no pun intended.
Good luck. Sounds like you are educated and advocate for yourself and that is half the battle I think.
Keep writing, it helps all of us 🙂
Donna
Monika,
What an interesting way to look at it. This disease does have a grip on ourt lives for sure. The frustrating part is that there is only so much we can do about it. Sure, we can react and we can advocate for ourselves but we still have the process and that takes patience. I think it is tough because in other aspects of our lives we have more control, more choices so to speak.
Thanks for sharing yourself with us. I hope you and that thyroid of yours can come to a happy medium soon.
Hugs!
Donna