Forgive and Forget, In Your Dreams, Thyroid
It finally hit home at my last doctor’s visit. What’s left of you is never going to get any better.
My body has decided to destroy you completely, and I will have to watch it , and feel it, happen. I wish my body hadn’t decided to attack you so viciously. I would defend you if I could, but my body has it’s own agenda: you have been targeted for termination! Sounds like some sick remake of a science fiction movie.
You worked so very well for me all those years. I appreciate all the energy you gave me. The energy I took for granted. Oh! The energy I miss so much! Not to mention all the other things you did for me so well. You were a pro! You were responsible for my slim body and long silky hair. You were responsible for my soft skin, sharp mind, and outgoing personality. You were responsible for so, so many things that are too numerous to list. Now all of those things are gone, and their replacements – to say the least – leave a lot to be desired! And to think, all the while, I never even knew exactly where you were located within my body – the body that was planning your untimely demise.
Some days I long for you to somehow make a miraculous recovery. Some days I hate you so bad, I could reach in through the hideous scar on my throat and rip you out myself! Most days I just wonder “Why?” Why can’t you fight back ? Why can’t I return to “Normal” again? Why have you forsaken me and taken my health, my relationships, my self esteem, and my sanity?
Yes, dear thyroid, most days I loathe you!
You make me a bitch! A full blown BITCH!!! You cause me to loose it, then cry for hours feeling guilty about yet another horrible scenario in my life that I can’t take back! Is that what they call “Thyrage”? You force me to put my plans with my family – especially my lovely children – on hold ; until YOU feel like throwing me a bone and kicking in a little help with the energy level! I REALLY hate you, for that!
You make me look like a blithering idiot. Groping for words , peoples names, and simple information in the middle of a conversation, while people look at me like I have a third eye. You suck for doing that!
You make me look at the hag in the mirror and wonder who she is and what has she done with my old self! You useless piece of crap!
You have cost me thousands of dollars in hospital and doctor bills – not to mention the mess you’re creating in my body, tested every 3-6 months! That really bites – you lazy, piss poor excuse for a gland!
Thyroid; I would have been much happier if I had never been formally introduced to you. But, I will miss you so badly when you are gone for good. And, you can sure believe; I will never, ever forget you.
(Bio) My name is Charlene. I am the mother of two young boys. I was diagnosed with Hashimoto’s in December 2008. I am 44 years old. I am trying to learn how to cope with this disease.
August Flickr Photos, August’s theme is HOPE. Today and tomorrow are the only days left to vote for the Marco Thylo T-Shirt contest. Very important, thyluuuuvahs, we are recording Mary Shomon on Friday 5PM/EST for our first Tales from Thyietnam Podcast. We are taking 3 calls. This is a great opportunity! Please email email@example.com if you want in.