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A Midwinter Thyroid’s Dream
Written by: Michael Wilson (Thyroid, Hypothyroid patient)
Dear Thyroid,
Others in the household have been commenting about how I’ve been spending so much time in bed lately; much more than usual.
When I think about it, it’s true. I have been spending oodles of time in bed for at least the last two to three months. This is most of my free-time, when not at work, including sleep; this is running 12-14 hours a day.
I have a hard time getting out of bed in the morning, and when I get home from work I usually crawl into bed with my laptop and surf the internet after I’ve tended to the four-legged children, the two-legged 40-year old children, and made food for myself.
Of course, it doesn’t help that it’s winter, and it’s been cool and chilly the last couple of months. It doesn’t help that the new sheets are much softer than the old sheets, either. This bed has never been more warm and comfortable and inviting. I’m afraid I’ve fallen under its spell.
This gets me to thinking. Am I depressed?, I ask because in the past when I was depressed, I’d often spend huge amounts of time in bed sleeping away; going off to dream land where everything is always happy. But, I don’t think so. I stay in bed, yes; but I’m not sleeping. Nor do I feel depressed. Actually, I’ve been in a very positive mood the past couple of months.
Thyroid, do you think the two are related?, I’m asking you this, because my new hypothesis is this:, your ability to keep ye old metabolism running is as low as ever, but I’m not feeling crappy like I used to; thus I feel good because I’m resting much more, and am not going beyond the meager energy reserves I do have. In essence, I’ve slowed way down to your level.
Do you think this is true?, Is the secret to living with hypothyroidism as simple as getting enough bodily rest (even if the mind doesn’t rest)?, Or has skin, instead developed an addiction to warm, soft, cushy fuzziness?, (…and it does like warm, soft, cushy fuzziness…)
OK, well, I think I’ll turn off the computer now; roll over, and actually doze for a while. All this thinking has me tired, but in a good way.
Michael
—
How do you deal with thyroid related exhaustion? Do you have time to give your body the rest it needs? When you don’t get what you need, how do you offset the
Tags: affects of hypothyroidism, hypothyroid exhaustion, Hypothyroid literary support, hypothyroid support, hypothyroid symptoms, thyroid blog
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20 Responses to “A Midwinter Thyroid’s Dream”
Leave a Reply to katie
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Michael….I think most of us with thyroid disease understand exactly where you are!
I don’t feel depressed either, but, the hardest thing I do every morning is stumble out of bed and start the day. I exist through the day waiting for the time when I can go back to bed! It’s just so warm and cozy all snuggled up under heaps of blankets. Is it bedtime yet?!
Oh, Vicki;
Thank you so much for sharing your thyzuastion yarn. I am SO SORRY that you are as tired, too.
Question — How do you make it through the day feeling so unbearably tired? What things do you do to get through?
Hang in, bed is coming soon.
xo
I spend tons more time in bed too. Sometimes I feel bone-tired, other times I feel like I’m trying to replenish my reserves, so I get what you are saying. It’s not that I always feel *bad*, just *less*.
Sigh. Thanks for the letter, another one to which I totally relate!
Robyn;
Bone tired are the words I’ve used to describe how I have felt to my endocrinologist. I didn’t get much of an explanation. If you spoke with your endo, what was his/her response? Would love to know.
So sorry you feel that exhausted.
Sigh squared.
xo
I feel the same, but don’t have the luxury to stay in bed. And docs keep “insisting” that I MUST be depressed. I’m NOT sad, just no vim and vigor. Hopefully my new doc will be one who LISTENS to patients about how they feel– she was willing to switch me off Levothroid to Armour, is supportive of me going to acupuncture appointments (which are NOT covered by my insurance), and didn’t say anything about a trial of whatever antidepressant Kaiser is pushing this month.
I make myself get up in the morning and work out. But crawl back into bed mid-afternoon for a nap if I can manage it. The dark circles under my eyes are not a fashion statement. Bone tired is the perfect term. I hate that we have to feel this way but it is comforting to know I’m not the only one.
Kaytee;
Every time I hear patients speak about doctors not listening to them, when we clearly know our bodies better than anyone else, I find it so insulting. Of course you’re not depressed, you would know if you were and would handle it accordingly. To be told that you are depressed when really you’re just exhausted because of your thyroid is horrible. I am really sorry that you had to go through that.
Thrilled about the new doc. Love his/her new attitude. Can’t wait to hear more about it. Please let us know how it goes.
Thanks for sharing your yarn.
xo
Hi Pammey!
Bravo for working out, right on, girl! Crawling into bed mid-afternoon makes perfect sense when you’re bone tired. What else can you do?!
Like you, hate that we have to feel this way, though very glad we aren’t alone.
xo
Michael, You don’t seem angry about the drain you are having on your energy levels, is it a matter of getting the dose right? I’m still figuring it all out through experience having gone from bone tired to being overdosed. At least I know now why I am seeing every beautiful sunrise with a pounding heart. Now I wonder whats next, feeling normal and doing I hope. I sure do miss doing things, that feeling of looking at the thing you’ve done and going, wow! I did that! Please Michael, fight the fight and get it right, oh I do so hope that this “getting it right (dose) is not an illusion.
Shan;
It’s not an illusion. After years and years and years, an endo finally got it right. So far 6 months of a balanced roid under my belt. It will happen, my love. Be brave. Keep fighting and never be afraid to get a second, third, fourth, etc. opinion (not that you are).
Those hyper palpitations and heart pounding, so awful. Hang in, babycakes. We’re all here for you.
xo
Michael,
With Hashi’s I swing both ways – bouncing off the walls like a cat on crack and becoming one with my couch with my woobie. (BTW, I can recommend something much better than a Snuggie for those days. It’s called a Cuddle Wrap. Uh, huh. It’s just as yummy as it sounds. Even has snaps on the bottom to keep your tootsies toasty.) Anyway, I had an unbelievably long run of those crack kitty days, until I found my new fabulous endo (can you hear the heavenly music?). At long last, I have what I call “smooth” days when nothing in my body is buzzing, pounding, vibrating, or twitching and I can just BE. And, yes, actually rest. Just like you, I don’t always sleep, but just to be able to rest and actually feel like my body is in a healing mode is the best!
I think this is a most excellent place to be. Congrats on getting there!
Brenda
Katie,
Do a lot of things to stay awake…I always try to exercise at least 4 times a week. I hate it, but, I do think it helps with stamina in general. Today was one of those “really hard” days. Went to dentist this am. Ok, so I’m deathly afraid of the dentist. Had two cavities. They gave me valium. Had to take one last night and one before appt. After dentist appt. I thought I might lay down and rest. Got called into work! Sooo….out comes the energy rush drink mix and the adrenal support drops in water. I spent from 4-10 running up and down 2 flights of stairs waiting on a party of 25, busing the tables and cleaning the kitchen. Home now. Exhausted. But, i will get to sleep in tomorrow morning for a bit before I head back to work.
For now, I guess I can just get through it. Though co-workers ask a lot “are you okay?” I look like I’m fading all the time. Age, Hashi’s and steps suck!
I have the opposite problem. I am hyper and cant sleep at all…however I do wish I could stay in my nice warm bed and not go to work! Good luck to you! It sure is nice to have someone to talk to who understands what I am going through. I am so glad I clicked on my internet and saw the Dear Thyroid website. At least we know we are not alone now!
It is so nice to know that you’re not “the only one”. I just thought I was lazy or a rotten housekeeper. I pull it together long enough to make it through my work day (usually 10-12 hours) then come home and collapse. But my house DEFINITELY is not as neat as a pin because I don’t have the energy to keep it that way (and in truth, partly because it’s not that important to me). Thanks to everyone for sharing so we don’t feel alone.
Vicki;
Really great point regarding exercising and building stamina. I am trying to push myself harder to exercise because I think it will help with overall energy. I appreciate you sharing that tidbit with me.
I remember when I was a food service engineer, I didn’t have Graves disease at that time. I CAN’T IMAGINE what it must be like having Hashimoto’s and working as hard as you do. It’s not an easy dollar!
I am in awe of you, child.
xo
K
Hi Bonnie;
Welcome to the Jacked Thyroid Club. I wish you weren’t a member, of course. I wish nobody was.
Do you have Graves’ disease? I know from hyper symptoms and that crazy insomnia and heart beating out of your chest, palpitations, etc.
I wish you could stay in bed and chill and not go to work.
Hang in, my love! So glad you have joined us.
xo
Katie
AnonTHP;
I am so glad you know that you are NOT, NOT, NOT LAZY or bad, period. You aren’t. You are working SO HARD. With this disease to put in that many hours is AMAZING. I don’t know how you do it!
Just an FYI – Your house isn’t the only house on the block that is a mess. If you saw mine right now, you’d spit twice and die.
We do the best we can.
YOU ARE NOT ALONE! We’re all in this together.
xo
K
Ahh I LOVED this letter! I always feel so tired too! I love my bed. I thought I might be depressed but I’m not. I seem to be sleeping more than ever.
The docs have ran loads of fatigue tests on me but haven’t found anything wrong- apart from hypo and anaemia.
I’ve started up a new blog to come to terms with my hypothyroisim. It’s so therapeutic. It’s only a few days old but if you want to have a look: http://glandtastic.blogspot.com/
Hi NS:
So glad you loved this letter. Thanks for sharing a bit about you and sharing a link to your blog. I’m glad you’re writing about your thyroid issues.
I am so sorry that you’re going through such hell!
I hope you’ll consider writing and submitting a Dear Thyroid letter. We’d love to hear more from you.
http://bit.ly/6BCo1L
xp
Shan wrote: “Michael, You don’t seem angry about the drain you are having on your energy levels…”
Funny they should publish this letter on this date because this week is the 10th anniversary of my diagnosis. There I was a studly active 26 years old, and here I am a pudgier, blah 36 years old.
I was angry, yes, at first. But, it’s been ten years now. Life keeps going and anger is toxic. The time for anger is past.