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Saturday December 3rd 2016

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Thyme For Some Literary Healing: How Has Your Thyroid Impacted Your Relationships?

Cassie’s Dear Thyroid Letter, “Who Am I This Minute, Thyroid? You Tell Me!“, struck a chord with all of us. In fact, I don’t think there was anything we couldn’t relate to: Thyroid {insert name here}, feeling like a monster, being swallowed so completely, we no longer recognize ourselves, and relationships, among other things.

This afternoon, let’s address some of our biggest fears lingering in the back of our minds or dominating them by answering these three questions, in comments.

  1. How has your thyroid affected your relationships?
  2. Do you regard yourself as two people, as Cassie did in her letter today: Thyroid you and you?
  3. Do you worry about what the future brings? If so, what concerns you the most?
How has your thyroid affected your relationships?
Do you regard yourself as two people, as Cassie did in her letter today: Thyroid you and you?
Do you worry about what the future brings? If so, what concerns you the most?

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16 Responses to “Thyme For Some Literary Healing: How Has Your Thyroid Impacted Your Relationships?

  1. Em says:

    1. How has your thyroid affected your relationships?

    My temper is far shorter today than it was. I’m less patient with people and I get tired far more easily. (And my libido is down the pooper! GRR!!) My husband has had to be a lot more patient with me. I’m blessed that I married such a patient and understanding man. Even if he doesn’t quite get the full extent of this disease (though I’m only beginning to learn it).
    2. Do you regard yourself as two people, as Cassie did in her letter today: Thyroid you and you?

    I remember the old me. Running at a million miles an hour all the time and able to go go go on very little sleep. I miss her! Now if I don’t get at least 7 or 9 hours (preferably 9 but that doesn’t happen a lot) I’m a cranky not nice person. (Am I allowed to say bitch? Cause that’s what I am!) Though I try to keep my mouth shut and be quiet.

    I agree with Cassie, I hate that the me now has to depend on medicine, but unlike her, I’m lucky that mine keeps me regulated. (That broke my heart.)

    3. Do you worry about what the future brings? If so, what concerns you the most?

    I worry about having kids one day. I worry that one day I may progress to where medicine doesn’t control me. But my ultimate worry is that I turn out like my “crazy” uncle. He is hypothyroid as well and refuses to take medicine for it. (He claims he was “healed” but since I know what it is and know the symptoms I see them alive and well in him.) I don’t want to turn out like him!

  2. Christina says:

    1. How has your thyroid affected your relationships?
    Relationships?

    2. Do you regard yourself as two people, as Cassie did in her letter today: Thyroid you and you?
    Absolutely.My regular me and my thyroid me are two completly different people. It, ´s like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hide. When thyroid me comes out to play it, ´s no fun at all for the people around me. So much for relationships.

    3. Do you worry about what the future brings? If so, what concerns you the most?
    I don, ´t worry too much about what the future brings because every single small decision I make each day changes it anyways.
    There, ´s one thing I know for sure about the future though.Even ten years from now I, ´ll still have to take a pill each day and deal with doctors on regular bases.(I just really hope they are not that arogant and ignorant by then anymore).

  3. Jen says:

    1.How has your thyroid affected your relationships?

    Almost ended my marriage but we are working on rebuilding and making it stronger now that we understand why I’ve been the way I’ve been for so many years. I know I’m not as patient as I could be with my kids and that hurts.

    2.Do you regard yourself as two people, as Cassie did in her letter today: Thyroid you and you?

    I don’t even remember the pre-thyroid me. That was over 10 years ago when I was younger, newly married, and before kids. I’m just Thyroid Jen pretty much all the time.

    3.Do you worry about what the future brings? If so, what concerns you the most?

    What concerns me the most is that my kids will also wind up with thyroid problems as I’m the 3rd generation in my family already. I worry that doctors will still be ignorant and influenced too much by pharmaceutical and insurance companies. I worry that I will always be Thyroid Jen and never feel normal.

  4. Casie says:

    Oh wow. I didnt realize so many people were in my shoes! Which — ugh, I wish you all weren’t! I worry about my kids, especially if I have girls someday, having to go through thyroid issues — my mom, my grandmother, and my aunt on my dad’s side all have thyroid concerns. Surely, my kids will have it too…nerve wracking, but I hope that because of my experience, and having been so young when diagnosed, Ill be able to help them IF that day ever comes — AND hopefully the doctors are more responsive to treating a PATIENT and a PERSON rather than results and symptoms…much love to you all!

  5. Dear Thyroid says:

    Em – Love your honesty and bravery. Surely none of what you shared was easy. Very proud of you, doll.

    Much of what you said felt like a knife in the gut because I could relate so perfectly to what you said

    I know what you mean about the future, and not wanting to devolve into that crazy relative. I wonder how many others share our fear? I suspect quite a few.

    I’m always asking myself, “Now, where did I leave my sex drive, again?” But, then I forget I had one to begin with. Sigh.

    At least we have each other to get through this; and through this you will get.

    PS: Curse away, my dear. Cursing is fair game on Dear Thyroid.

  6. Dear Thyroid says:

    Jen – Your bravery brings a tear to my eye and joy to my heart. So proud of you.

    Thrilled to hear that you and hubby are working on reinventing your relationship. Patience, understanding, perseverance; it’s all so challenging with thyroid issues.

    I hope your children never have to endure a thyroid issue.

    As you said, and a few others said, not remembering who we were post-thybacle, boy that’s a seemingly insurmountable wall, isn’t it? Do you see glimmers of your former selves? Do you ever have days when you feel normal?

    Beautiful post.

  7. Dear Thyroid says:

    Christina – love what you wrote, very proud of you!

    You’re right, there is a glaring difference between, as I’ve always said, our thyroid selves and ourselves. That feeling of normalcy, to be draped in it for longer periods of time would be so magical.

    I understand and relate to your fears wholeheartedly. In fact, I think we all share them.

    Beautiful post.

    xo

  8. Dear Thyroid says:

    AND hopefully the doctors are more responsive to treating a PATIENT and a PERSON rather than results and symptoms; Let’s hope!

    I think the more we come together and write about these issues that we face, including our fears, our voices are heard — and we will have the power to invoke change.

    Casie – you are not alone, my sweet. Sadly, so many of us endure the same issues and fears. As you said, you/I/we wish it wasn’t so.

    xo

  9. Angelina J says:

    1. How has your thyroid affected your relationships?
    2. Do you regard yourself as two people, as Cassie did in her letter today: Thyroid you and you?

    I am certian that I do not know where to begin. Thankfully my husband is a wounderful man, however is not home except weekends most of the time. This leaves Thyroid Angelina with too much time to herself. The gland shall let you think it may be ok to do things you know you should not do. I, unlike most, have too much sex drive. I am hyperthyroid with graves disease. I wish I had more control over Thyroid Angelina, she dosen’t care much about anyone elses feelings. She doesn’t even have the decency to hide what she does from Angelina. She makes her clean up the messes. Today she has made Angelina forget to buy her son’s Birthday present. What next??
    Thank you for letting me vent.
    Angelina the Glandalina

  10. Jaleta Clegg says:

    Where were you 10 years ago when I was dealing with thyroid cancer? I would have loved this kind of support and information back then.

    I have no thyroid. As long as my medication is in the right zone, I do fairly well. I don’t have the energy or stamina I used to, but I’m better off without my thyroid. I do worry about my girls (I have 3). I see some of the same symptoms I dealt with for years that never cleared up until after my thyroidectomy and radioactive iodine treatment. At least I have hope that when they develop enough symptoms to be treated, they’ll have sites like this one to help them through it.

  11. lori says:

    1. How has your thyroid affected your relationships?

    In every negative way possible. It has ruined most; they are gone. It has even strained family relationships for me. I’ve missed out on so much.

    2. Do you regard yourself as two people, as Cassie did in her letter today: Thyroid you and you?

    Interesting question! I’ve come to realize I don’t know if I ever had a chance to know the “real me” very well but I did manage to enjoy through high school years as much as possible, even though I was symptomatic way back then (we are talking the ’70s. I rode horseback every weekend and competed in gymnastics for four years. I’m glad I have those memories (other than childhood one’s). I am hoping there is two of me, thyroid Lori and Lori! I am starting to have glimpses of who I think I might be the “real me” as I get closer to balance and I can’t wait to see what evolves. I am optimistic. One thing this disease has taught me about the “real me”, is that I cannot give up.

    3. Do you worry about what the future brings? If so, what concerns you the most?

    I worry everyday about getting quality back into my life; it’s time to do more living than surviving. I worry about my children’s future and their children’s future. I worry a lot about young people getting diagnosed properly and then having to fight for proper treatment. I hope no one has to ever go as long as I did! The thought of that breaks my heart.

    It makes no sense that medicine can transplant organs but not manage thyroid diseases. I wish someone could explain this to me.

  12. Angelina The Glandalina;

    I’m so glad you vented with us and shared your story. Having Graves disease too, I know from that insatiability. I’m sorry your hubby isn’t around more. Though, that’s where accessories and toys do come into play literally.

    On a serious note, I’m so sorry that ATG is enduring so much and struggling with memory issues, among other things.

    Know that you aren’t alone. We’re all here to support each other as we venture through the hell that is the Gland Canyon.

    xo

  13. Jaleta — So glad that we found each other finally. What was it like to endure thyroid cancer 10-years ago? What resources were available? What treatments were available? Was thyroid cancer as marginalized then as it is now? Sorry for all the questions. Please don’t feel obligated to answer them.

    I can appreciate why you would worry about your children; makes perfect sense. I’m just grateful they have you to recognize the signs and point them in the right direction.

    Please keep writing, connecting and sharing your thoughts.

    You aren’t alone. We’re all in this together.

    xo

  14. Oh Lori, I love everything you wrote. I am so proud of you… as always, especially for going there; not an easy place for anyone to go to.

    I love your enthusiasm and optimism about the future and getting to know your new self. After everything you’ve been through (knowing your thyroid history a bit), to see you blossom and feel filled with promise, it just warms my heart.

    I worry everyday about getting quality back into my life; it’s time to do more living than surviving. LOVE YOU FOR SAYING THIS!

    I agree with you regarding modern medicine. We deserve a cure, in my opinion. We can put a friggin man on the moon. Certainly we can cure autoimmune thyroid disorders and thyroid cancers. Why not?!

    xo

  15. Elizabeth K. says:

    1.) The most significant way my thyroid has affected my relationships is pretty simple: I’m usually too tired to spend as much time as I’d like to with my friends and family. My family (usually) understands (because I’m third generation hypothyroid), and I think my friends do, too. But I can’t help but wonder if my friends see me as weak, or if they don’t call me to go out and do things because my thyroid makes me feel all over the place at times.

    2.) Hmm. I don’t think I see me as two people. What I do see, though, is a slow realization that the different things I was thinking, or forgetting, or experiencing (PCOS, heart arrhythmias, sleeplessness, anxiety, depression), were possibly all symptoms of my then-undiagnosed thyroid problems. Simply put: that shitty glad has caused almost 10 years of ups and downs for me and those close to me.

    3.) Immediate future: are my heart arrhythmias related to my thyroid? all test results have come back normal (but I wonder what *normal* actually means), except for my antibody count. I hate not having answers more than anything else. Doesn’t help my anxiety one bit.

    Long-term future: I’ll reiterate what some others have said before me. I’m afraid I won’t be able to have children of my own. I’m trying to “work on me” right now (mentally and physically), so that someday, when I find the right man (ha!), we might have a better chance of having children. The thought of the whole thing overwhelms me, and nearly paralyzes me. Makes even the thought of dating again seem pointless.

    🙂

  16. Helena says:

    1: My thyroid issues have definitely affected my relationship. I’m married to a man who expect me to carry the heavier load, and since I’m getting more and more tired, it creates disagreements that at least I very well could do without.

    2: I don’t see myself as two people, like Cassie wrote. I’m born with these issues, but when I was a child, people never understood why I reacted as I did. If people had known then what they know now about thyroid issues, things would have been much easier.

    3: yes, I worry about the future, if I should get worse, even more tired and stretched, what will happen to this marriage. It’s at its breaking point right now, and I can’t see any improvements in the future.

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