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Pining for My Real Thyroid to Begin… Again
Dear thyroid:
I miss you! Not the problems we had, but you!!!! I sit in my cubicle drowning, wondering where you are??? Are you on a shelf somewhere?? Have you been incinerated???
Can’t we try this again? No matter what people try to tell me, life will NEVER be the same without you!
Leslie
Tags: Dear Thyroid Letters, how life changes post thyroidectomy, Pining For My Real Thyroid To Begin... Again Written by Leslie, pining for real thyroid, thyroidectomy blog, thyroidectomy loss, thyroidectomy patient letters, thyroidectomy support
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7 Responses to “Pining for My Real Thyroid to Begin… Again”
Leave a Reply to Lolly
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Dear Leslie,
You are right, life will never be the same. That is one thing we all seem to agree on.
But different doesn’t mean down forever. Last night I watched a TV show where a young woman without legs was DANCING>and smiling and happy. What does she know? What brought her to accept the “way she is”.
True she was born this way so it is all she knows. But still why doesn’t SHE feel cheated like so many of us do and have?
Me? Well I think it;’s attitude!
We can’t change what we are, but we can change how we think about it.
I could relate to her story in a very small way because I was 10 years old and run over by a car.
As the car {tire} sat on my leg. I remember thinking, wow this is a very BIG PROBLEM! Numb by whatever these things in our body are I had an outer body experience.
I sat under this car and watched the things around me happen.
First, I was alone. Second the children that were with me ran away. Third the place was Paris and I couldn’t speak the language yet, we had just got off the ship.
I had instinctively began the tools of survival. Fear pain whatever were not there. I was free to think. Humm nothing I knew yet prepared me for this. Instinct, was there as it is for all of us.
We are made to survive. We have the tools within us. If we don’t panic and give up before we try we just may be able to save ourselves.
Are you thinking , come on it’s only a leg? Yes you are right. But I was 10 years old, what does a 10 year old really know?
I was alone, 10, in a different country, at the time unable to run away. I had to think, trust, pray, hope, consider what was I going to do and how could I keep myself from further harm.
Things were happening all around me. A young man maybe 16, came running out of the tavern where he worked. He caught my eye and I knew he had come to help me. He then alone did an impossible thing. He lifted the car off me. ALONE!@~
Now think about what just happened. Others were there and they didn’t try this, why? Because they thought smartly that they could do nothing. Why because they believed as we do that the car was too heavy! Yes, no one would disagree, they weren’t being lazy and they weren’t being uncaring they just considered that FACT!
But this boy, he didn’t think if he could or he couldn’t, he just did it.
He did it because he wanted to, he did it because he could see that it had to be done. He wasn’t “thinking” oh no, No one could lift this off, it’s impossible!
Call it what you will, to me it was a Miracle. And it will never be explained any differently. Oh and I meant to mention he was a skinny kid!
More, When I was placed on the sidewalk I had a chance to look at my injury. This was very strange indeed.
Bones were pointing in all kinds of directions. I felt no pain {yet}. My tennis shoe was torn. But this is wild. My skin was intact. I had no blood but a scrap or two. I learned that everysingle bone in my ankle was broken but not the skin. {?}
The rest of the day was a very long story and I won’t focus on it here.
But a few details I want to share. It was a VERY complex break. I went to a clinic followed by 2 hospitals. Nobody wanted to mess with it.
sorry I punched in by mistake, maybe this is too long sorry but I am trying to say something here and I hope you see.
I am saying, “we think too much”, we believe we can’t before we try.
I was just going to say that they didn’t know if my leg would ever grow again. I had to wonder what will I be able to do? I’m a kid. I love to ride my bike, climb trees, dance, run jump and everything I ever knew involved having two legs.
In those 1960’s I’m not sure yet what we had to be a leg, but I don’t think we had much. At least I can honistly say I DIDN”T KNOW ANYTHING !
I had to wait and grow, I had to wear a cast a very long time and for awhile it went to my hip. No body wanted me to try and use it. It would just have to do it’s own healing. They put me under and snapped it all back together…..That must have been something….No cuts no stitches. Just hold and pray.
And believe. I was young enough not to over think this mess. I let my body do what it had to do. I did get very very tired of waiting to see what would happen. But I did not hinder the healing by thinking it would never be the same. I just excepted that we’d have to wait and see. That is what kids do all the time. QWait and see if you can do this or that or whatever. So as a child I kept my thought unpoluted by nay sayers and reading horrible endings and never was focused on thinking only negitive thoughts.
It all came out pretty well really. I have a dent there to remind me but no scar. I finally got to ditch the awful corrective shoes I had to wear. with a metal plate in the ankle. I never could ice skate very well as a result, but I did with a double blade. I snow skied and water skied but not with out wobbles, but I still did it cause it was still fun.
So I hope this long story helps somebody. It just seemed approbriate to share with you here.
Good luck and think happy thoughts…..Love, Linny
Leslie,
I too wonder what my thyroid is doing now, when part of you is taken away it seems like you are not whole.
Lolly
I would take mine back, cancer and all, just to have a few sane, painless, HAPPY moments again.
I’m sorry if my story above didn’t make sense to you. I was just trying to share the discoveries I’ve been making to feel better. I’m not over this yet either. But I have begun to change. I have more thoughts like my old positive self. Things will get so bad for me, and I think I could burst, and then something is starting to happen. I see a glimmer of hope. A thought comes to me that I can beat this.
I start believing it’s true and then it becomes true.
Maybe a dip in the weather throws me, Or a family member is upset about something. Or a tragedy happens around us. Or a food has distrubed me. Or a Toxic chemical is inhaled…..something is factoring in to this once calm moment.
I feel like a detective. I want so to find the KEY. In fact I started collecting Keys. Ok weird, maybe but harmless. Look around you, something must be triggering our “attacks”.
Your skin, the biggest organ on your body. Make it sweat, get the toxins out. These are all things that I have found are helping me and I want you to have a short cut.
If I have one I want to share…..that is what I keep trying to say when I rattle these stories , that may seem pointless…..but I believe the answer is somewhere and I’m working on it too.
Believe. Lets find it together. Share what you think as strange as it might seem. We can beat this thing, I just know somewhere in my gut, we are close…..I feel the change coming…..Hold on we’re going for a bumpy ride.
Good Luck, I’m think of you too……xxxxxxLinny
Linny;
LOVED WHAT YOU WROTE – Loved what everyone wrote. We’re all sharing OUR PERSONAL EXPERIENCES; that’s the beauty, I think. We share what we have learned with each other and allow each person to find their own way.
xo
Thank you, I feel better if I think I might be helping. I never was good at laying around. I always have to have something to do or I WILL GO BONKERS!~
It’s just my way, my husband will say….why don’t you just relax. Ha, I wish I could. If I’m laying down I’m really bad and I don’t want to go back there.
I do find that being outside, forcing myself up and out…..I feel better. Maybe I will just do a little something, than a little more, then my joints start getting looser. I get into it and breath the fresh air. The trees overhead give us the best air to breath. That is not in the house, or under my bed.
Well just think healthy. Mind over matter. Love again, me