Fat Thigh-roid Woes: Chicken or the Organic Free Range Egg?
**Hey DT Friends! The impossible has happened…I got a job. Woo-hoo! I started on Monday and have been busy busy busy getting into the groove of things (I’m supposed to work 40 hours a week again? How does that happen?) and wanted to just share that with you. Also, because it brings me to my column o’ the week story. ***
During my orientation this week, I had lunch with someone else who was brand new. We got to talking about healthy food, because she was on this plan to cut out all the chemicals, junk, and eating mostly whole foods. Since I’ve been striving for this since the Graves bullshit, I participated in the convo with ease and enthusiasm.
Then, “The Question With Many Possible Answers” came up:
“So, what made you want to change your eating habits?”
I heard the needle being yanked off the record – and if this were a movie, all eyes in the cafeteria would bore into the back of my head while silverware clanks to break the silence.
That type of question has only one answer for me, and it’s all cause of my hateful relationship with Graves.
I could have said “Oh just cause I wanna eat healthy…” – not only because I might not want to get into it, but also because this is someone I might be working with in some capacity…was it such a good idea?
I told her the truth. The Honest and Shameless Answer: “Oh, I got sick a few years ago with a bullshit autoimmune disease, and I just decided that I never want to be in that position again…so I’m doing everything on my end to stay healthy.”
Call me crazy if you want. Just starting a new job and yapping about being sick at one point in life before my career at this company has even started.
It’s gotten me on the path of pondering why and when did “sick” become the looked down upon equivalent of being “weak”? I’ll admit, I was physically and emotionally weak when the Graves fiasco was peaking, but now, I’m not in the same place. Why can’t I be honest about the past that was my disease? Why should there be any shame regarding what happened? It’s not my fault, nor does it make me a weak person.
My disease DOES NOT define ME. I CHOOSE to define my disease.
Graves and I have a tug of war on any given day. Sometimes, he wants to bully me and I let him. Other days, Graves hangs out and knits in a corner. Most of the time, I bend Graves over and slap him silly. Now that I’ve been through the HELL that is Graves, and managed to come out on top – that does not a weakling make.
Each and every one of us becomes stronger for it. For any disease out there, damn it.
The fact that you’re here, and seeking a community to share, laugh, and cry with is a testament to YOUR strength.
If you were a weakling to begin with, Graves would have crushed you long ago – and you’d be under your covers, unable to seek any help. Instead, you’ve taken the fighter mentality and are choosing to kick Graves in the ‘nads.
Don’t beat yourself up whenever you’re having an off day, week, or month. You’re allowed to live with some self pity/misery/anger because you’re dealing with a shit filled deck of cards right now. Just keep trucking through to find the path to healing.
Don’t hold onto any thought of being weak since you’re sick, or used to be sick. Wear it proudly. You can say you’ve climbed the Mt. Everest of Disease, and you’ve come out on top.
And finally, have a great weekend!