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And, the Academy Goes to… My Thyroid!

Post Published: 01 August 2013
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Category: Dear Thyroid Letters
This post currently has 5 responses. Leave a comment
Dear Thyroid, I am writing to apply for the position of Healthy Individual

Dear Thyroid,

You sure do like the spotlight, don’t you?
As you well know, you’re such a complicated little organ that it wouldn’t do to visit just any old doctor.  No.  You need someone special.  Someone that doesn’t exist in our small little hamlet.  Or the other small hamlet where we work. 

No, you need someone that is 55 miles away from my office, making frequent work day doctor’s visits horribly inconvenient.  But to you they are special days, perfect for a special organ.

Earlier this year, I got my blood test reminder in the mail.  I sighed, scheduled my lab appointment, and wondered how in the world I would fit in a wasted half day to see our special doctor, Janet.

So, imagine my surprise when I received this phone call from her!

“Hi Gina, this is Janet, I just got your bloodwork back.  It looks so good and so consistent from last time that I don’t need you to come down for an appointment.  That is, of course, if you’re feeling okay.”

Feeling okay?  This news was fantastic!  I was feeling ECSTATIC.

“Actually, I feel great.”  A pause.  A long thought.  “Well, you know, I’m a few pounds heavier than I would like, but that’s just because I’ve not been eating that great and I’ve not been exercising like I should.”  Right.  It’s my fault.

“Okay, well if you’re sure you feel okay I’ll go ahead and refill your prescription.  But you be sure to call me if something starts feeling off.”

“Yes, of course.  You know us thyroid patients (Janet happens to be hypothyroid as well), we’re real tuned in to our bodies.  I’ll definitely call if something is up.”

But I won’t need to.  Because I’m fine, I’m treated, it’s all good.  I’ll just stay steady on my current natural thyroid dose.

But you, thyroid; you just can’t stand to be in the background.  You couldn’t stand to miss your special day this year.  You can’t stand for me not to be constantly worrying about you, thinking about you – even though you don’t even function anymore since the radioactive iodine treatment.  You STILL want to be the focus of my life.

So what if I haven’t been sleeping very well?  I’m stressed out.  We just sold a house that we had been trying to get rid of for 6 years.  Work is insane.  We’re building a 2000 square foot addition.  Of course I can’t sleep.  It’s perfectly reasonable that I fell asleep at my desk last Monday morning.  It’s not to do with you.

So what if I suddenly have constant heartburn after every single meal, no matter what I eat?  I mean, I’ve never had heartburn in my life I’ll grant you that, and I’m eating more fruits and vegetables than I ever had, but I’m sure there is some kind of explanation that is all my fault for the heartburn.  It’s not to do with you.

So what if my cholesterol levels that were really great are now suddenly high again?  See my earlier thoughts about diet and exercise – that’s why.  It’s not to do with you.

So what if my hair texture is really strange and coming out in bigger handfuls?  Must be that homemade shampoo I made recently.  I mean the first two batches were great on my hair, but it must be that third batch that really did it.  It’s not to do with you.

*Insert long pause here.  Really long.*

Who am I kidding? It’s ALWAYS to do with you.  And that’s just the way you like it.

 

—-
 Gina Thorsen – I am a 37-year old living happily on a small lake in rural northern Wisconsin with my husband and 3 pets.  I have been struggling and surviving with Graves’ Disease, the radioactive treatment that followed, and now hypothyroid treatment for about 12 years.  You can find me at www.facebook.com/ginathorsen or on Twitter @ginathorsen.
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5 Responses to “And, the Academy Goes to… My Thyroid!”

  1. Ashley says:

    This is hilarious! These are things that I have always thought about my thyroid, but I never thought about writing a letter to it. It’s a great way to express the frustration in a different way.

    Thanks for sharing!

  2. lollyjolly says:

    Hi Gina,

    I can certainly relate, and even after your RAI and my surgery I have worse problems than I had before surgery and Hypo… Thyroid won Lolly Nil.
    Hope things improve for you there is hope.

    Lollyx Graves disease.

  3. Dr Pullen says:

    Too funny. Thyroid disorders are so common, up to 15% of women, and in some families much more common, that it’s easy to get too hung up on the mundane aspects of treatment of TSH to goal, and not focusing on support for patients and symptom relief. Your comic relief helps.

  4. Michael says:

    This is hilarious, such a nice way to get rid of your frustrations about that complicated little organ that frustrates so many people. Great blog – bookmarking it right now.

  5. Gina Thorsen says:

    Thanks everyone for your support and great comments. Yes, laughter is often the best medicine!

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