Thryme and Punishment or Not
Dear Unwanted Thyroid;
Every morning I awoke with you pulsating in my neck; Yeah you!! The diseased organ I use to know nothing about, and then suddenly, you became the bane of my existence.
My antibodies that loved your presence in my neck, hounded me daily. The butterfly rash was somewhat — NOT — a fashion accessory. Neither was the goiter that would stick out from my once slim line neck. Why did you do this to me!?!
You made me so angry. My anxiety was sky high, and, unfortunately, before they noticed you were up to your tricks, I also had a diagnosis of OCD. Yep, and you did that to me. Why did you have to do this to my body and break down my immune defenses?!
Before you, I was not at the doctor’s office every couple of weeks, nor did I need pin cushion joints, created by the constant requirement for blood tests.
I wasted precious nights that I could have been sleeping, thinking about how to get rid of you and the risks attached to the surgery. Full of anxiety, I tried to fight with you constantly. Until, I finally realized that you were not going to rule my life. I was not going to let you.
Now, you’re gone, and all that’s left of you is a scar. But, somehow, I don’t care about that, in fact I’m rather proud of my war wound. I would rather have a scar to remind me of your absence, than a butterfly rash and crazy symptoms you put me through. You stopped my life for 2-years and now I need to take tablets for the rest of my life.
I will thank you for one thing; bringing new friends into my life that are going through similar issues. Without them, I wouldn’t be at a happier place I am.
My life is good now, and it will continue to be!
Thank you for making me appreciate life more.
Becky
XX
(Bio) I’m, Rebecca, I’m 23 and I was diagnosed with Graves’ disease, when I was 19. It’s been a long journey, but the knowledge I, have gained about me and thyroid disease, has been invaluable.
Tags: Dear Thyroid Community, Dear Thyroid Letters, epistolary series, letters to thyroid glands, letters to thyroidectomized selves, letters to thyroids, thyroid blog, thyroid disease, Thyroid disease support, Thyroid patient letters, thyroid support
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14 Responses to “Thryme and Punishment or Not”
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Rebecca,
Thanks for your letter! We were both diagnosed young- you younger then me(25), but I can understand how you feel robbed of some of your supposed to be “best” years. I too, had mine removed (6 weeks ago). How do you feel today? You sound strong, which is always an inspiration to everyone here. Thank you again for your letter-another soldier in the Thyroid Army is still standing, while your thyroid is dead and gone!
Becky!
Man oh man can I sympathise with you – pretty much similar situation, doctor’s are pretty sure I have Graves’ too and I am 17.I’m undergoing tests right now.
I’m super glad that you are so willing to share your story so thank you so much for that. I also feel very encouraged by your positve attitude. Stay safe and stay happy
Bek xo
Rachel,
Thanks for commenting and sharing a bit of your story with Rebecca. It’s so true that being diagnosed young makes you feel like your future has been stolen from you. Not to say that we don’t ALL feel this way (no matter what age you’re diagnosed), but speaking for myself (Liz), being diagnosed at 22, I feel like I will spend the rest of my life trying to figure this disease out, instead of just trying to figure life out. You know? Maybe Rebecca feels the same…
I can’t say I feel fantastic, but I would love to!!Its just been one of those months. Been on a dosage of 200mcg for ages and then wham, looks like I need an increase!! But never mind, I just wish the doctors would relise that we cannot have a good life style when our FT4s are so low! But if its not there body, how are they supposed to understand huh!!
Hey, so what about you, how are you feeling?? Six weeks huh!! Had any thyroid labs done since the big day??Hows the scarring?
If you want to contact me, I am on the above website and you can PM me there! I am Becky on the forum.
Hugs and Hope to chat soon!!
Rebekah,
WOW! I am sooooo sorry to hear that you may be getting diagnosed while still in your teens. How are you feeling about it? Are you nervous? Do you think you do have Graves’? How is everything going for you? We are here for you sister!!
Hi Bek!!
I am so sorry that you are having to got through all of this now. I mean, just when you think life is going oh so well, it kinda sneaks up on you! The thing with thyroid disease also is that it is the invisible disease and yet it has a really big influence on how you feel. Massively. Such a small organ has such a large responsibility.
I do hope to chat with you soon.
Hang in there!!
I also very much agree with Liz. But the question is, how do we change that?
Thanks Rebecca!! Hopefully you WILL start feeling even a little bit better just with time. We understand and care how you’re feeling, even if our thyroid disease is much different from yours.
hey
I guess that I am stressing out … a lot but I tend to be a worry wart – I don’t think I have Graves’ though. Even though my levels show that it’s most likely what it is, I haven’t really lost much weight at all. My doctor also suggested thryoid cancer which I suppose is the scariest part of the whole situation.
My thyroid is disgustingly swollen.
Bleargh.
Thank you so much for your support!
x
Rebecca,
Also, what you’ve said about thyroid disease being invisible is sooooo true!! No, we’re not in a wheelchair. No we don’t have bruises an IV in our arm. But yes, this disease can be all-consuming and is life-altering and wrecks things. It can’t always be visibly seen, which is probably why it isn’t taken seriously by so many people. It is more than a weight problem and it is more than being fatigued.
Rebekah,
Oyyy. So sorry about your health. It’s gotta be so hard on you to hear cancer as a possibility. When will you find out, again? We are so hoping that you can get some definitive answers soon. Make sure to ask alot of questions!!
i’m going to the endocrinologist in 2 weeks … and then having more tests and then I guess I should know for sure…
Okay, Rebekah. Good luck darling! Keep us updated as to how you feel!!