Author Archive
Thyridiocy
Dear Thyroid, I am so, so, sorry! I am oh so sorry that it took me so long to throw your lazy ass out of my body!, That's right. You heard me. Like all women in a bad [Read] | 3 responses.
Thycancerrific, And… Seriously?!
Dear Thyroid, In early 2007, I tossed you onto the pile of bio-hazardous special waste at the university hospital. You were cancerous, and I, well, actually since I was unconscious, [Read] | 14 responses.
Oh, Dear Thyroid, Can’t We Please Gland Along?!
You'd think I would have started asking for rent already. You know, a monthly fee of some sort to justify the presence of this ugly thing that's living with me; a most unwelcomed [Read] | 15 responses.
Your Thywhipping Bitch, I Am Not
Dear Thyroid, I'm only 23, Dear Thyroid, why now? Our relationship began unexpectedly, and similar to other people's stories, I got fat. And, also, like others, I was not eating [Read] | 28 responses.
She’s Still Standing AND Living, Take That, Thyroid
Dear Thyroid, It's been 14 days since you have been gone. It has been 14 days since you have been taken out of my swollen neck, killed and thrown away. It has been 14 days since not [Read] | 14 responses.
How To Kick Your Thyroid’s Ass: Thyfused? Join The Healversation!
I'm well aware it's nothing normal, but the same way most people collect photographs and old home videos, and music that means something or carries certain memories, I collect words and [Read] | 33 responses.
Thyrants Of The Week July 18 – 24
Hello Dear Thyroidians, How are you? First, if any rants have been left out, please email Katie and I will make sure this post is updated with your thyrantyliciousness, capisce? [Read] | one response.
A Thynundrum Indeed
Dear Thyroid, I've been so angry at you these past few years - ever since you turned on me. I thought we were close. I thought we were looking out for each other. Then you [Read] | 8 responses.
Goiticon And The Half Blood Princess
Dear Thyroid, This is Goiticon your sinister sidekick. I am writing to warn you of difficult days ahead. Forces are aligning to discover our dark plot to destroy The Hostess. She [Read] | 11 responses.
You Expect Thygiveness After What You’ve Taken From Me, Seriously?!
Dear Thyroid; I am told you look like a butterfly, fluttering imperceptibly at the base of my neck. I imagine you pretty, delicate, in slightly iridescent shades of pink. Who couldn't [Read] | 20 responses.